Friday, January 2, 2015

fostering adventure for the new year

Over Christmas break we've gotten more calls from DHS than at any other time in these last 6 months since Miss B left.

On New Year's Eve I was so tired and had no plans to stay up until midnight. I could not wait to get to bed! But as I was cleaning up, we got a call a little after 10PM because a little boy had just been picked up by the police at a crime scene and they needed immediate placement.

The laws in Oklahoma state the children under 6 are not to stay in the shelter so they try to get them into homes immediately. He was outside of the age range of what we had specified for a child we could take, but they said it would be temporary as they searched for a kinship placement for him.

He came after 11PM that night and we spent some time getting acquainted and trying to figure out sleeping arrangements and clothing. He came with what he had on, and the worker brought a pair of shorts, underwear, and a t-shirt from the shelter. Ironically I had JUST given away all of Daniel's too-small clothes.

Finally by 12:30AM he was in bed and asleep. However he began crying in his sleep two times during the night and had to be comforted. I felt for the little guy, witnessing violence, missing his mommy, being taken by the police and put in a strange home. I can't imagine how overwhelming that would be for a preschool aged child.

It has been a couple days of adjustment, scrambling to get clothes, waiting on knowing what is going to happen with him, and trying to integrate a new person in the house.

The most heartbreaking thing is that he is processing what went on in his home that night and seems to dream about it. He also misses his mother terribly. He talks about her a lot, but it is unlikely that he will be living with her anytime soon.

I was able to download her picture and print it off for him. He shrieked with delight and has carried that picture around the house, hugging it, kissing it, and talking to it and about her. Today it was surprisingly easy to get him to his bed for "quiet time." When it became quiet--after he was "reading" his books for a little while--I looked over at him and he was asleep and clutching the picture of his mama.

It brings tears to my eyes to see both the affect of witnessing violence on this little guy, as well as his normal and strong desire to see and be with his mommy.

I hate that some parents make such mistakes that their children pay the price and that both the parent and child end up in these situations.

I pray that this little man is able to go to a suitable relative, or a long term home that would be the very best for him, to help him heal and grow. And that his mother will get the help she needs.

(Here he is asleep with his mommy's picture, turned over)



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